How a Father Dealt With His Son, the Bully

From the Advocate:  

When traditional disciplinary methods such as grounding and even hard labor had no impact on his son's behavior, Jose Lagares took his son to a busy street corner in Killeen, Texas, Tuesday, and made him hold up a sign that read, "I am a bully. HONK! If you hate bullies."

KCEN reports that Lagares received his fair share of criticism for his decision, which is why he returned to the same intersection Wednesday, carrying his own sign, reading, "I am not sorry!!! Honk 2 Stop Bullying."

Lagares said bullying is a serious issue and that as the parent of a bully, he's committed to putting a stop to his son's behavior. 

"I'm not going to allow my child to be someone else's pain," said Lagares. "We don't need another Columbine … and I refuse for my child to be the cause of that."

Lagares told KCEN that when his son returned to school Wednesday, he apologized, of his own accord, to the student he'd bullied. 

Church of England To Fight Against Homophobic Bullying

From the BBC: 

[Archbishop of Canterbury Justin Welby:] "With nearly a million children educated in our schools we not only must demonstrate a profound commitment to stamp out such stereotyping and bullying but we must also take action. 

"We are therefore developing a programme for use in our schools, taking the best advice we can find anywhere, that specifically targets such bullying." 

New proposals before the Synod meeting could see measures to introduce women bishops be adopted as draft legislation ahead of a possible vote in 2015. 

The archbishop, who took up his post in March, has said he wants to see the measure passed as soon as possible.

Even though the Church of England is not changing their teachings on marriage (they are against equality), this effort against anti-gay bullying sets them light-years ahead of most churches in the United States. Here, instead of protecting LGBT students, many religious schools have policies in place that preclude them from seeking help from faculty and staff for fear of expulsion. Even outside of parochial schools, churches, religious figures, and leaders of social conservative groups fight against legislative efforts to protect LGBT students from bullying in public schools.

What the Church of England is doing here is the right thing to do. Would that churches in America would do the same...

A New Deadly Front For Bullies: Kids With Food Allergies

Tweet of the Day: June 17, 2013

Sometimes humanity seems anything but humane.

My Decision 2012: LGBT Equality

LGBT Equality

Mitt Romney is no friend to the LGBT community, not even those conservative/Republican LGBT’s who plan on voting for him. Despite the fact that he ran to the left of Senator Teddy Kennedy on LGBT issues during his 1994 attempt at elected office, he has since flip-flopped. Now, he is for enshrining discrimination into the United States Constitution. This shows that he has no regard for the concept of equal protections under the law which is in the 14th Amendment of the Constitution. If he has no regard for the Constitution, how does he intend to execute the oath of office he would have to take as President (I.e. upholding the United States Constitution)?

Aside from marriage, he went on record as being against the repeal of the military’s Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell policy which kept gay people from serving openly. While he has since said that he would not try to reinstate DADT, Mitt Romney has shown a penchant for switching his opinions on issues. How long until he does so on this policy? As soon as the religious right applies the appropriate amount of pressure, he will start talking out of the other side of his mouth yet again.

President Obama has gone on record as supporting marriage equality and has stopped his administration from defending the so-called “Defense of Marriage Act” when it faces the courts system (which it has done many, many times in the last few years). President Obama also signed into law the repeal of DADT. The President is a supporter of the "Employment Non-Discrimination Act." He has even done an “It Gets Better” video in a campaign to fight against suicides that result from the homophobic bullying experienced by the nation’s LGBT youth. Does anyone honestly think that Mitt Romney would take such a step as that? He has had the opportunity to, yet has not.

The only way that LGBT equality will move forward at the federal level, the courts not withstanding, is with President Obama winning this election. He has already given the community more than any other president, and I wholeheartedly believe that he will take us even farther towards equal rights, making this country a more perfect union with liberty and justice FOR ALL!

Lowlights & Highlights: October 13, 2012

Unfortunately, yet another life has been lost as another young person was bullied to the point that they despaired of life. Unlike most of these instances that I have mentioned that it was due to anti-LGBT bullying, I don't think that was the case this time around, though it is still no less tragic. Another life lost before reaching its potential makes the world a darker place.

This time it was Amanda Todd from British Columbia, Canada. She suffered years of bullying. Before ending her life, she left a video on YouTube. Honestly, I haven't seen it. I don't have the emotional fortitude to go through the whole thing but I'll leave it here:

Hopefully both in Canada and here in the States, we realize that the problem of bullying is one that needs to be taken seriously. One life lost is one too many. Our young people have far too much potential for us to stand idly by while it gets snuffed out because of the cruelty of others. You can read more about what happened HERE.

Rest in paradise Amanda.

~

Oh, the Vice Presidential debate was a sight to behold. Granted these particular debates don't generally win or lose the contest at large, but they can definitely shift some momentum. After the first presidential debate last week, the Obama/Biden team needed a boost (even though Romney's performance, good though it was, was based pretty much on lies). Joe Biden did a great job of not letting Paul Ryan get away with telling half-truths, hypocrisies, and outright lies.

One of my favourite bits was when Paul Ryan talked down about stimulus plans and bailouts. Joe Biden then proceeded to point out the Paul Ryan requested some of that stimulus on multiple occasions, thus showing Paul Ryan's hypocrisy. Another instance of hypocrisy was when Paul Ryan said that there should have been more security at the embassies which were recently attacked. Joe Biden then proceeded to point out how Paul Ryan, a member of Congress, voted to defund embassy security to the tune of $300,000,000. Joe did what President Obama should have done with Mitt Romney (and hopefully will due in future debates): Joe pointed out when the other side was full of "malarkey."

It's also funny how when Romney was interrupting in the first debate, conservatives said nothing bad about it but when Biden did it, they called it "obnoxious." The need to get their story straight: either it's rude ALL of the time or NONE of the time. What's good for the goose should be good for the gander.

Their are some on the mainstream media who called the debate a draw. They are idiots (I'm looking at you CNN). Rachel Maddow has an interesting take on how you can tell who actually won the debate HERE.

Bullied Teen Sues School

From The Advocate:

A gay high school student who was expelled after using a stun gun to fend off bullies has filed a federal lawsuit against Indianapolis Public Schools.

WIBC reports on the suit filed by Darnell “Dynasty” Young, 17, and his mother, Chelsea Grimes. The family says they reported the harassment several times to officials at Arsenal Technical High School, but administrators blamed Young for being “too flamboyant.”

“The lawsuit filed in U.S. District Court in Indianapolis Friday accuses IPS of violating Young's civil rights and also of violating his First Amendment right to free expression for trying to get him to dress differently at school,” reports the station.

It Gets Better: San Francisco 49ers

This is the first NFL team to do an IGB video.

LGBT Suicide Isn't A Problem...???

Bullied Teen Refuses to Be A Victim

From the Columbus Dispatch:

Bullied since second grade, the openly gay 16-year-old was harassed and taunted for acting “ girly,” having long hair and being different at Unioto High School in Chillicothe.It came to a head in October when he was severely beaten in his third-period class by another student, and it was captured on video.

That’s when [Zach] King and his mom, Becky Collins, went from victims to activists.Since the attack, they’ve told their story to groups of teens and adults, most recently at the American Civil Liberties Union of Ohio’s biennial conference yesterday in the Sheraton Columbus at Capitol Square.

As part of a panel discussion called “It’s Getting Better,” they talked about what can be done to prevent and react to bullying and harassment of gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender youth.

“It’s empowering to do this, to share my story with other people,” King said after the discussion. “And I hope they will learn, and one day there will be a lot less bullies than there are now...”

 You can read the article in its entirety HERE.

The Wrap-Up: June 28, 2012

Former first lady Laura Bush and former vice-president Dick Cheney are being called out, but not by the left.

Congressional Republicans are coming up with lots of "reasons" to impeach President Obama.

Bryan Fischer, leader of the conservative, Christian group American Family Association thinks that we should let poor sick people die. I think he needs to reconsider his religion, since he has zero understanding of the Bible.

The U.S. may cut aid to Uganda because of the African nation's crackdown on the gay community.

The president of Exodus International takes about a half step towards being more progressive, admitting that homosexuality can NOT be cured (although the rest of us knew this ages ago). Half a step is better than nothing.

Rep. Mike Honda (D-CA) along with about 36 other representatives will today be launching a congressional Anti-Bullying Caucus. It's that this is necessary, but good that kids will (hopefully) be protected.

Selena Gomez and Justin Beiber were on the House of Representatives? Wait for the explanation...

A committee in the California state assembly has approved a bill banning "reparative therapy."

And lastly, Republicans with delusions of grandeur. It must have been hard to narrow this down to just five, but these five are pretty big ones (especially the final one on this list).

NOTE: The Supreme Court will handing down their ruling on the Affordable Care Act (I believe) at or before 2 PM Eastern.

The Wrap-Up: June 7, 2012

Wondering why you should care about the Wisconsin recall election if you live outside of that state? There are definitely many reasons why we should ALL care.

Miss Pennsylvania USA resigned over the Miss Universe Organization's apparent support of transgender candidates. Between her, Rick Santorum, and the Philadelphia Eagles, that state is looking less and less pleasant.

Short of stories that include suicide, this is probably the worst bullying story I have heard, in part, because it was also the school system bullying the student and their family.

The Florida Department of Law Enforcement is saying that it is more likely that someone will be struck by lightning than it is for voter fraud to take place in the state, contrary to the statements of Governor Rick Scott.

Even though the USDoJ has ordered Governor Scott to end the purge, Scott would rather have a showdown on the issue (the deadline to respond to the DoJ's order was yesterday).

Republicans have learned nothing from the assassination attempt against Rep. Gabby Giffords as another gun oriented ad pops up (and it has nothing to do with the NRA).

Yet another federal judge has ruled that the so-called Defense of Marriage Act, specifically article 3, is unconstitutional. House Speaker John Boehner (R-OH) is spending lots of tax-payer dollars to defend this discriminatory law and not getting much bang for his our buck.

The state of California will be investigating the National Organization for Marriage Discrimination over allegedly breaking campaign finance laws. You can thank Fred Karger for this.

And lastly, there will be a live stream tonight at 6PM of a debate between Maggie Gallagher (co-founder of the National Organization for Marriage Discrimination) and John Corvino (associate professor of philosophy at Wayne State University)

The Wrap-Up: June 6, 2012

Today is the 68th anniversary of the D-Day landings on the beaches of Normandy.

As of when I'm writing this, the Koch Brothers Citizens United Scott Walker won the Wisconsin recall election. He does still have some nagging legal issues to get sorted out.

Senate Republicans are blocking an equal pay law via filibuster, thus showing that A) filibuster reform is a must and B) Republicans think women don't deserve equality.

A nun who has voiced support for marriage equality has been denounced by a bunch of people that shield pedophiles from the rule of law the Vatican.

Another school district has failed another child who was the victim of malicious bullying because his peers thought he was gay (silver lining: there was no suicide in this story).

A New Jersey doctor denied an HIV+ man from access to his medication, which could have made him resistant to the medication. It would be a crime for this doctor's license was left intact.

Davis, California created its own currency, and apparently they aren't the only place in the States to have done so.

Romney has zero room to talk about the Obama administration and Solyndra. He has his own solar issues.

Proposition 8 supporters have lost yet another court decision.

And lastly, the self-marriage trend.

The Wrap-Up: May 30, 2012

Apparently black people started what has since become Memorial Day. You're welcome for the long weekend folks.

While making a Memorial Day speech, Senator John McCain (R-AZ) was heckled by a protester. I'm no fan of McCain for the most part, but there are times when he says things worthy of being heckled...and this was one of those times.

Tea Party darling Rep. Allen West (R-FL) has praised elements of the Affordable Care Act (aka "Obamacare"), meaning he probably won't be a Tea Party darling for long.

A Minnesota pastor may lose his church because he supports marriage equality. Of course this is happening at the same time that other churches who are using their pulpits to gather money to fight marriage equality retain their tax exempt status. Where is the justice in this?

A Florida high school is under investigation after a straight student attempted suicide because of anti-gay bullying (the state has an anti-bullying law that may have been ignored).

One of the victims of Florida's voting purge: a veteran of the Battle of the Bulge.

The European Union adopted a resolution condemning anti-gay laws in the continent. Hopefully Russia (among other countries) is paying attention.

The Boy Scouts will receive a petition some 275,000 signatures strong supporting a den mother who was ousted from her position solely because she is a lesbian.

And lastly, Liberty Council's Matt Barber thinks it is offensive and demeaning the the NAACP (the nation's oldest civil right organization) supports equal rights for ALL Americans.

Dharun Ravi Gets Sentenced...

But just barely. After a "joke" that resulted in the suicide of Tyler Clementi, he was sentenced to a paltry 30 days in jail, a $12,000 fine, and 3 years probation (which includes 300 hours of community service). In my opinion, giving him the full 10 years may have been overkill, but this sentence, if it can so be called, is a true insult to Tyler Clementi's memory. Here is the statement from Garden State Equality (with which I largely agree):

Moments ago, Judge Berman decided to sentence Dharun Ravi to 30 days in jail. We have been public in taking a position of balance: We opposed throwing the book at Dharun Ravi. We have spoken out against giving him the maximum sentence of 10 years in jail and against deporting him. That would have been vengeance beyond punishment and beyond sending a message to the rest of society.

But we have similarly rejected the other extreme that Ravi should have gotten no jail time at all, and today’s sentencing is closer to that extreme than the other. This was not merely a childhood prank gone awry. This was not a crime without bias.

Remember that Ravi had messaged his motivation in violating Tyler’s privacy: “I saw him making out with a dude. Yay.” Remember that before Tyler took his life, Ravi messaged a friend: “Keep the gays away.” And remember that because Ravi had tampered with evidence, his post-facto messages to Tyler that he, Ravi, had no problem with gay people understandably lost their credibility to the jury.

Dharun Ravi wasn’t convicted of a bias crime unfairly. Dharun Ravi was convicted of a bias crime because his own words broadcast anti-gay animus to Tyler Clementi and the world.

Since the verdict, Dharun Ravi’s extraordinary lawyers and their media operation have deemphasized these facts, stunningly able to recast Ravi in the role of victim, scapegoat and even folk hero. But we remember the trial itself – a long and painstaking trial where Ravi had the best team possible, unlike many other defendants charged with serious crimes.

None of us not directly affected by this tragedy has reason to be happy. Tyler Clementi is no longer with us. Another man – M.B. – has seen this tragedy wreak havoc on his own life. The life of a third man, Dharun Ravi, will never be the same again. And Tyler’s family will forever have to live with the loss of their son, brother, nephew and cousin. May the family receive strength from their loving memories.

Those who have oppose giving Dharun Ravi jail time have asked, hasn’t he suffered enough? But we believe there’s another question: Has Dharun Ravi done enough? Has he done enough to use his place in history to speak out against student bullying and to make a positive impact on millions of lives across our state and nation?

Thus far, no.

Though Tyler Clementi has left us, the rest of Dharun Ravi’s life will help tell his life story. Ravi’s own lawyer portrayed him as a young man who engaged merely in jerky behavior. Ravi can stay that course, or he can do some good with his life by making amends and fighting for the justice and dignity of every individual, including people who are LGBT. That much is up to Ravi.

As for all of us, we must continue our focus on building a better world, one free of bullying of every student, so that a tragedy like this never happens again. That’s what New Jersey’s Anti-Bullying Bill of Rights, the country’s strongest anti-bullying law, is ultimately about.

Our thoughts and prayers are with all whose lives have been changed by this tragedy.

The Wrap-Up: May 21, 2012

Athletes from the University of North Carolina - Chapel Hill have posted a video for the "It Gets Better" campaign. I guess someone had to make the state look tolerant in the wake of Amendment One.

Mitt Romney wants to blame President Barack Obama alone for the massive cuts to military spending despite the facts that A) military insiders are on board with much of the cuts and B) the GOP definitely had a hand in $500 in cuts. What a classy fella...

Over the weekend, the NAACP officially announced its support for marriage equality.

The Pan-American Health Organization has officially denounced ex-gay "therapy."

In Minnesota, where there will be an anti- marriage quality amendment on the ballot come November, the debate has had new life breathed into it on both sides.

Rep Paul Ryan (R-WI) thinks that adding $10 trillion to the national debt will prevent a debt crisis. I believe this is what "W" meant by fuzzy math.

Remember that New Jersey teacher who wrote homophobic comments on her Facebook page a while back? The bad news is that she's avoiding penalties. The good news is that she is doing so by retiring. So long as she isn't in a position of power over kids (undoubtedly some of whom are gay).

And lastly, Evangelicals are on the wrong side of history...again.

Lowlights & Highlights: May 19, 2012

Here in the States and much of the Western world, the fight for LGBT equality centers around marriage, adoption, employment non-discrimination, and so on. While those battles rage on, it is easy to forget sometimes that in other parts of the world, gay people do not even truly have the right to exist. Case in point: it was reported this week that four Iranian men were sentenced to execution by hanging for sodomy laws. Iran is a nation governed by Sharia Law (meaning it is an Islamic theocracy) and homosexuality there is punishable by incarceration and/or execution. Strangely, the Iranian president said that they don't have that "problem" in his country.

We have come a long way in the West. Several countries have hate crimes laws, marriage equality and other such LGBT equality measures. Some countries, however, have a very long way to go, and their fights will be long and, unfortunately, bloody.

***

There were many people who responded to President Obama's announcement supporting marriage equality. Some agreed, some disagreed. One of those who disagreed was Bristol Palin. In her response to the president's announcement, she did not just give the standard right-wing diatribe against homosexuality (which would have been bad enough on its own), also managed to call into question the president's parenting skills. While some agreed with Bristol, there were some who were not so kind...to say the least. She reported death threats and bullying committed against her. While I certainly think that those kinds of responses go way too far, she should have expected at least some backlash.

One of the responses to Bristol Palin caught my attention. It was written by John M. Becker from Truth Wins Out, an organization that fights against misinformation from the "ex-gay" movement specifically and homophobia in general. Here is part of his response:

Hey, Bristol. I’m so sorry that you felt bullied by some of the abusive comments that were left on your original post. They are indeed awful and inexcusable.

That said, welcome to the world that lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgendered people live in every day. In fact, according to an exhaustive analysis of FBI hate crimes data by the Southern Poverty Law Center, LGBT people are at a greater risk of being targeted for a violent hate crime than literally any other minority group — more than twice as likely to be attacked as Jews, 2.6 times more likely than African-Americans, nearly 4.5 times as likely as Muslims, almost 14 times more likely than Latinos, and 41.5 times more likely than whites. In large swaths of our country, gay, lesbian, bisexual, and transgender youth are regularly teased and beaten up for who they are (or who their peers *think* they are), all the while living in a culture that shames them into silence. Many of them have homophobic parents or guardians, so they can’t even turn to the people who are supposed to love them unconditionally. LGBT youth are four to five times more likely to attempt suicide than their straight counterparts because of the malicious bullying and crushing hatred that they’re surrounded by every day. I should know: I attempted suicide myself at age 16...

...In closing, I must submit an important correction. You wrote about the “younger generation” in the context of abortion, then continued in the same sentence about how “voters just keep defending [so-called] traditional marriage.” If you meant to imply here that the “younger generation” — *our* generation – supports the continued exclusion of loving same-sex couples from full civil marriage equality, you are wrong. Seriously, no, *incredibly* wrong. In fact, you couldn’t be more wrong: repeated polling consistently proves that our generation OVERWHELMINGLY believes that EVERY American deserves the freedom to marry the person they love, regardless of sexual orientation or gender identity. You’re free to hold any views you like, no matter how bigoted they are. But you are *not* free to misrepresent the truth. And the truth is that when it comes to marriage equality, the jury is in – and you’ve lost.

 You can read the whole article and response by Becker HERE. It is well worth the read.

Is Romney's Bullying Past an Issue?

For my part, this IS an issue, especially at a time when so many kids are subject to such homophobic malice that they are succumbing to despair and committing suicide. In part for the reasons laid out by David Pakman. This was an illegal act, it was malicious, and it was handled badly in the media by Mitt Romney in such a way that Romney was obviously lying about some part of this story. This was not merely some stupid prank, this was a kid who was targeted and assaulted.

Something that was not said in the video is the fact that when an anti-bullying task force was formed in Massachusetts while Romney was governor, Romney eventually snuffed the task force out. Obviously his animus towards the LGBT community has not abated, he is just slightly better at hiding it by not openly/physically attacking gay people. His views are still there, and he clearly has never seen LGBT people as equals under the law, and he still doesn't. That, so far as I'm concerned, is reason enough for me to not vote for him.

The Wrap-Up: May 11, 2012

Marriage equality opponents in Washington state have said they have almost half of the signatures needed to put marriage equality on the ballot.

Here are some...not so nice...reactions to President Obama's announcement supporting marriage equality.

House Speaker John "cry me a river" Boehner wants the President to focus on jobs, not marriage equality. Keep in mind Boehner is using taxpayer dollars to defend DoMA in the courts. Hypocrisy much?

What might this announcement say about the President's election strategy going forward?

One of the New York GOP state senators who voted for the state's marriage equality bill has announced he will not run for reelection.

It is now pretty clear why Mitt Romney has not lifted a finger against bullies: they are his people.

Here is little more on Romney's history with bullying.

Remember me saying I thought the Democratic Party most likely would not move the national convention out of North Carolina? Well, here are some reasons I may have been wrong.

And lastly, here is what people on the street had to say about President Obama's recent announcement:

The Wrap-Up: April 30, 2012

In news that makes me happy I didn't go to a religious school, a student is being kept from graduating from Bob Jones University because he was caught watching Glee.

Here is the rundown of what you need to know about CISPA (which passed in the House and, as reported earlier, faces a veto threat from President Obama).

Wondering what the Tea Party is up to?

The price of homophobia keeps getting tragically higher.

Some Wisconsinites need to pick their heroes more carefully.

Here in Virginia's Senate race, former Governor Tim Kaine is relying very much on former Governor (and current Senator) Mark Warner in his fight against former Governor (and former Senator) George Allen.

The fact that violence against women was such a partisan issue does not speak well for the Republican Party.

And lastly, with their secrecy exposed, ALEC may be on the brink of destruction. One can only hope.